Negativity & Regret

If this pandemic taught me anything, it would be that spending too much time thinking about the future causes way too much anxiety, tension, and stress. Just like living in the past causes you to regret and resent things that happened or didn't happen.

This is an accumulation of psychological time (thinking too far ahead or spending too much time reliving the past) and denial of the present.
Stop for a second and think about today. What did you do today? Did you experience joy? Did you achieve anything today, or were you stuck in limbo by watching too many series/movies or staring at the ceiling for hours on end?

How often do we do this to ourselves just to think back tomorrow or realising that all the things you were supposed to do today had to be rescheduled for the next day? The next day comes, and you feel absolutely overwhelmed by all the things that you have to do?

You see, each day that you walk this earth is an opportunity to build on your future (which is ultimately your tomorrow). Every day can be seen as a building block. Building blocks that form the foundation of your future, and if you skip one, your foundation is unstable.

This is why most life coaches or motivational speakers encourage us to make each second count. This often leads to extra stress, as we feel that we have to be positively busy every second of every day, and this is just not realistic.
Some of us spend hours on end topping and reminiscing about the past or obsessing about the future that we rarely just enjoy the present moment. It's ok to be doing nothing but do nothing with intent.
Intend on doing nothing for an hour or two and then continue with what you've planned out for your day. I know how tempting it is to watch another episode of a very gripping series. They always have this way of keeping us intrigued and interested in what will be happening next.

Binge-watching a series is the equivalent of escaping your reality or the present moment. It's easier to avoid/escape a situation than to be the creator of your own reality. We often lose ourselves in fictional stories, but what about your personal account of events during your whole life or even just during the 2020 lock down period? What story will you be telling your grandchildren one day?
What is happening next in the series called "My life"?

Today matters. What you do matter, just like what will be happening in the next episode of that series matter. The writer intentionally wrote that episode in such a way that you'll be interested in knowing more. You are ultimately writing your own story, and I, for one, want my story to matter. I challenge myself to take on new projects and learn new skills daily, and yes, I do get my days where I binge on series and other days like today. My mother scolded me today because I've been working for days on new content, new website, social media, and digital marketing strategies. I realised that my time matters today.

I closed the laptop and basically unplugged from all technology for the day. I joined my mother on her mission to the shops and spent time with my niece. Why? Because it matters how I spend my time and where I project my energy.
Yes, times are tough right now, and I'm working really hard to keep my brand and business afloat. Still, I've learned a fundamental lesson from my past (yes, the past, that place I suggested you don't spend too much time in), and that is that time can never be recovered. I've spent night and day working on my business in the past. Often ignored my family while vigorously typing away on the laptop, and two years ago, I lost everything I worked so hard for.

It was not because I wasn't good at what I did, or that I did something wrong. It was something unpredictable, just like COVID-19. It was entirely out of my hands, just like this pandemic. There is only so much you can do, stressing about the future or getting stuck in depression is just not going to help you at all.
Take the time to reflect and be aware of the needs of your loved ones. Be mindful of what is going on around you. If you do nothing, do nothing with intent, and if you intend to do nothing, do nothing, but if you want to build a future or live the life you dream of, you've got to live with intention. Doing something with intention is to do it with a firm resolve to get something done. You have to ask yourself if what you are busy with matters, and if it does, you have to prioritise according to your life goals. You can't go spend your time on something that will matter only in 10 years if your first priority is something that matters today. Building blocks, remember!?

Don't regret not taking opportunities for self-reflection, self-development, or building on your dreams. Once you start reflecting and making changes to your daily routine regularly, you will start seeing the results of your efforts playing out in your life. If you make a mistake, that's ok. Regroup and try again tomorrow until you get the results you want, but staying stuck and unmotivated, blaming it on circumstances, won't get you anywhere.

If your "stuck-ness" is business-related, read a book about the topic where you are stuck. Your mind will automatically start running off with ideas and concepts that might help you with the issue you might be struggling with right now.
If the "stuck-ness" is related to any kind of relationship issue. Whether it's with your mother, father, child, boss, or friend, watch a YouTube video or TedTalk about the problem, but don't go watching that series or movie.
Negativity is the brewing pit for regret. We never regret anything positive, but we do regret anything that has been done with a negative mindset. I'm not saying you have to be this happy-clappy annoying positive person all the time. I'm just suggesting that you be mindful of where your energy flows.

I hope you have a positive day today and remember, you have only one single life, live it now!